Avoiding Conflict: Why Speaking Up is Essential for a Healthy Relationship

relationships Feb 14, 2023
Healthy relationships

By Patricia Wooster

In relationships, it is common for one or both partners to avoid expressing their thoughts and feelings when something bothers them. This often builds tension that eventually explodes or causes one person to walk away. However, setting clear boundaries and speaking up about what is bothering us can prevent conflict and create a healthy and peaceful relationship.

Partners sharing rules and non-negotiables allows both individuals to show up as their authentic selves and navigate the relationship with clarity. Without these instructions, individuals are left to guess or try to change the other person, resulting in a relationship that lacks health and peace.

Having clear and concise rules helps to establish what each person will and will not tolerate in terms of treatment. If both partners are on the same page and value each other, they will go to great lengths to maintain the relationship. How one is treated is a clear indication of their importance in the other person’s life. Regular check-ins can help one assess how their partner makes them feel and if they feel valued, welcomed, and respected.

Words are meant to support actions, not replace them. It is essential to pay more attention to how someone treats us rather than being misled by their promises or words. This allows us to make more informed choices in our relationships. Empty words and broken promises can violate trust and indicate that someone may not fully value or accept who we are.

Designing Genius is about being and doing; this should be reflected in all aspects of our lives, including our relationships. Setting rules and standards before any violations occur helps to proactively establish minimum viable standards and avoid conflict. For example, having a no cell phone rule for dinner dates (if someone checking their phone bothers you) can set the tone for the relationship and demonstrate self-care and self-love.

Red flags that appeared during the honeymoon phase of dating are often the same issues that will eventually end the relationship. Holding boundaries and sticking to our rules will attract compatible relationships and repel those that are not. It is not fair to sacrifice our own happiness for someone else’s, and we cannot love someone more than we love ourselves.

Enforcing our rules and boundaries protects us from energy vampires and elevates our energy and vibration. Choosing to stick to our personal guidelines provides an energy boost and prevents the negative drain that can come from not following our own rules.

In conclusion, speaking up and setting clear boundaries are essential for a healthy relationship. By paying attention to how someone treats us, setting rules and standards, and sticking to them, we can create relationships that are healthy, peaceful, and full of mutual respect.

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